I'm not a dreamer

From what I understand, there are two trains of thought about personal facts (you state about yourself).

1. You're never allowed to say "not", "can't", "never", etc; lest you hold yourself back from something.
2. You recognize your individual gifting(s), and reasonably state your abilities (as you see them).

I fall into the latter category.  I actually like that facet about myself.  I like that I know what I'm reasonably capable of, while still being willing to stretch myself (reasonably).  I think it's a strength to know yourself well enough to do that.

My visionary boss disagrees.  I get into a lot of word-smithing messes over this issue.  Unfortunately, no matter how often he shares his view on this, I still disagree.

Therefore (according to my own belief of thought), I can state in all honesty that I am not a dreamer.  Or a visionary.  Or an overwhelming personality able to draw people in naturally with great ideas.

I'm a realist.  I see the facts.  I see the gaps.  I see the potential problems.  I also don't think this is bad.  Tempered with visionaries, it's a good combination of creative ideas and practical application all mixed together.

But put me in a group of all visionaries and I quickly become the unpleasant voice in the group.  The resident "killjoy".  Honestly, even for a realist, no one wants to be that.  I hate being the unpleasant reminder that practicality defeats that wonderful, utopian idea.  It's like killing cute, little puppies and kittens.  Yet, isn't that information valuable at some level?  At some point?

So I hold my tongue and say nothing.  And then I feel (or am perceived) as unengaged or not opinionated.  Quiet and unresponsive.  But no one really wants to hear my opinion.  In "word" they do, of course they want everyone to feel valued and able to share, but they don't really want the cold, hard, reality I bring.  At least not so quickly.  I guess at least.

Essentially, I feel like I lose at all levels of those conversations.  How can I be myself (the realist), while interacting with a big bunch of visionaries?  I feel like I'm doomed to failure after all of these conversations.  I literally feel like I'm unable to succeed.  There is very little more frustrating than that.