More growth

Several months ago God laid mentoring on my heart.

Not just to mentor those younger than me, but to find someone to be my mentor.

To mentor and be mentored.  Succinct.  Easy enough, right?

I told God "okay", and while I worried about finding the "right" mentor (Where would they be?  How would I know when I found them?), God led me to youth ministries.  Apparently I needed to learn what would be necessary of me as a mentor before I could figure out what I needed from someone else.  I get that now.

As I listen to God I keep hearing Him whispering "Holy Spirit".  The next step.  I'll admit, I've shied away from the spiritual realm for most of my life.  Living in the concrete and tangible.  But the last few months have continually brought me back to this spiritual realm and the forces I battle with.  Admittedly, not a comfortable place, but incredibly eye opening.

So of course that is where God would continue with my growing.  Not that youth ministries and all the twists and turns associated with serving there hasn't been enough of a growing experience.  It's time for me to delve into more growth.  Pull up my sleeves and really dig in.  Plus, the only way to peace is through obedience and trust.

I've had a lot of certainty lately.  Lots of times where I know I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, or pointed in the right direction.  It's nice.  And it's terrifying.  The clouded feeling of never knowing what was next made it really easy to ignore things or not really move forward.  But the cloud seems to have dissipated.  It's still unknown territory, but I can see the signs.

I'm still afraid of the unknown though.  And I'm afraid of what this new step might practically mean for me.

Looks like it's time to jump regardless.