Restraint

I learn random facts about myself all the time.

This is what I'm learning right now.  I'm not good at keeping things to myself. I have an incessant desire to share almost everything.  It's absurd.  And with technology at my fingertips, I usually do end up sharing.

Disclaimer: If it's important not to share and it's another person's news, then I can usually make it, but it's HARD.

I'm being taught restraint.  And it's really difficult.

I want to tell people, but I know I shouldn't.  So I try to think of why it would be "okay" just this once.  And then I just clamp my mouth with wood clamps close my mouth and let the moment pass.  It always does.  And I'm just the same as I was before.

I'm learning restraint.  But I'm also learning that I share things for a reaction.  It's causing me to reevaluate the things I feel drawn to tell people.  Sharing ideas, thoughts, feelings, and memories with people isn't wrong, but some of my motivations are.

I'm also learning how conversations, while great for processing certain things, stretch ideas or concepts or feelings.  Just like throwing pizza dough.  Each conversation moves things forward or backward.  But always moving.

I don't think this one is supposed to move.  At least not now.